From time to time we all struggle to uplift. We need help sometimes. I am sharing my story of dealing with relentless pain in the hope that it will inspire or help someone.
What I learned through this pain helps me to deal with any difficulty, not just pain. This is my own spiritual journey, what lifted me up, gave me strength and continues to fill me with love, grace, joy and all that I need.
Dealing With Relentless Pain
Stabbing, gnawing, burning, severe pain ripped my life apart and made me pray for death. I never imagined that I would suddenly be wrestling with this demon. Not when I was skydiving or mountain climbing or other activities that could have gone bad.
One minute I was on top of the world, full of joy, meaning and purpose, and suddenly in the Atlanta airport, on my way to Kosovo with humanitarian aid I was paralyzed, unable to walk. I lost my urine. My spine had collapsed cutting off the spinal cord. There had been no pain or warning. I was flown back home and within days had back surgery. From then on I had unrelenting serious pain and disability. After more than a year doctors told me it would get worse, that I should forget about going back to practice, but I held out hope and gave it my all. Another year and the pain got progressively worse. I developed arthritis, colitis, uterine bleeding, and migraines. I am sure they were due to stress. My spirit of joy turned into a deep depression.
One day, at the end of my rope, with pain I did not think I could stand another minute, I looked up to God and said HELP! Immediately I felt a kind of peace and quiet. I observed my thoughts and then my heart, where I felt love and peace. I realized that getting emotional was making the pain worse. I had done all I could do. I started objectively observing and feeling the pain and it became so much less very quickly. It was an aha moment that was life changing. I can use this meditation anytime I need it. I know God loves us and wants us well. Love is the greatest healer, more important than anything.
This has been a great teacher, helping me to grow spiritually. I had been telling God what to do. He knows what to do. Now I trust Him. He can do anything. I listen and follow the Spirit’s leading. I had to let go of resentments and forgive – they were hurting me.
Then my next door neighbor introduced me to her Young Living oils. I was skeptical but now I am sure they were a gift from God just when I needed them. The first day diffusing oils lifted my mood and helped me relax as I had not been able to for a long time. The next day breathing in the pleasant aromas and applying oils in addition helped my aching muscles more than anything else before. And a nutrient drink, Ningxia Red, gave me energy and a feeling of well-being, something else I had not felt in a long time. This combination gave me hope, and I know it helped me a lot to eventually get back to helping others.
I am not totally pain free but I don’t need drugs. I have oils. I am back to a life full of joy, meaning and purpose. If I take care of my spiritual, emotional and physical health, pain is not a problem. If it flares I have the tools to use. If I don’t have love, don’t take care of myself, hold onto hurts that people sometimes inflict, or if I let stress or negativity crowd out my conscious connection, I can be bedridden in few days.
I had more surgery as my spine collapsed again, and I had a brain tumor removed. I have gone through various other difficulties and frustrations, all without negativity, but with lots of grace, faith, love, much gratitude, and a sense of humor. I hope I have encouraged someone. I would love to hear from you.
Sending you grace, joy and love, Dr. Joan
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Information shared here is not intended as medical advice, and cannot substitute for professional medical advice and information. Information provided is general in nature and may be helpful to some people but not others, depending on their personal medical needs. Always consult with your personal physician before changing or undertaking a new exercise program or following advice designed for general audiences only. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay getting care because of something you have read here.